1. "I am that I am"
2. Desire (Neshama)
3. Everything exists between 0 & 1.
4. Zero & One
5. Math and infinity
6. Atom of Existence
7. The Journey of the I
   1. The beginning
   2. In the end
   3. Position
   4. Positive and Negative
   5. Inner and Outer
8. Unpack
9. Another I (one)
10. From the zero (0)
11. Choice
12. Union with G-d

"I am that I am"

Only the Divine, Great Spirit can be represented by the statement "I am that I am".

In a sense, it represents the trivial statement, the one of identity, represented by $1 = 1$.

However, the truth behind it is this: $I$ am the only $I$ that is fully $I$. In other words $I$ am the only $I$ that fulfils $I = I$. This is known as the "enlightened" one, a fully self-realised person. Any one else is $i < I$, incomplete, not fully realised, still in flux.

NOTE: Representing the Rav's concept of benoni mathematically, one could propose that -1 is the completely wicked person, and 1 is the full-realised person. Then 0 is the enlightened one.

Desire (Neshama)

The beginning begins with the emergence of the One. How the Nothing became 1 is beyond a miracle. There are absolutely no words (in any language) that describe either what the 0 is, or how it became 1. Though there is a way to express it in every language, and it is an essential part of every language. In fact, everyone can "speak" this divine language. It is called ... silence!

Everything exists between 0 & 1.

Start from One. From the generally accepted wisdom that everything arose from the One, and everything is reducible to the One. Oneness, which is, was and always will be the Source of Everything.

That is the beginning for our narrative can only begin with the existence of something — which we call One.

The paradoxical nature of this statement is that actually, in order for there to be any narrative, we need at least 2 — the binary, the duality, this and that. However, for anything to happen, the minimum is 3...

One is insufficient as there is nothing to know of the existence of the singularity, if that is all that there is. One could refer to it as a closed loop. Selfish, self-centred and narcissistic. Knowing of none other than itself. In order for anything to “exist”, there needs to be another state of being, and thus there will be two (2) — itself and the other, the other that can know of "existence" as different from a state of non-existence. It can “witness” — even if only through experiencing — the event (of its "life/existence"). But that is still not enough. There has to be some way that the two can interact for there to be any meaningful dynamic (if that is all there is in existence). That produces the third emanation — even if only through have an experience of the other in any form or fashion.

Let us say that there are two aspects to One. We have the one that is the first amongst (hopefully) many; we have the one that signifies the singular; and we have the number 1, which is a symbol that signifies such as situation. Thus, the singularity that we refer to as Nothing, or Zero (0), becomes the One that is before there is 1. A place from which the ‘I’ had not yet emerged. Thus it naught, Ø, the empty set – a place where even the one does not exist.

Zero & One

Starting with only a zero (0) or a one (1), all fractionalisation occurs upon encountering the densities of our manifest existence.

From zero nothing emanates. It is the only point that is not a point. Once one emerges, then all other "numbers" can emanate from the one. But only nothing emanates from nothing. So how did something emerge from nothing? That is the deepest mystery of all.

Regarding our conscious awareness, we start of as 1, aware only of the I and it's needs. Purely egotistical and trying to survive in a hostile environment. Selfish, youthful, unaware, we awaken to an other, and now are entering 2d. We move from the beautiful innocence of I to the awareness of the duality. From the simple - it is what it is - to seeing the reflection in the illusion, encountering the unreality of some deeply held beliefs until there is a deep splintering of inner and outer. It is here our true journey begins. We have just passed through the first gate and reached the outer temple courtyard. We have entered the exploration of duality.

• 3rd - child, something born, another enters.
• 4th - realising it is all in your imagination! And that your imagination opens up whole new realms of existence too.

Math and infinity

Mathematically speaking, there is a one-to-one correspondence between all the real numbers between 0 & 1, and all the integers. In other words for every whole number there is a corresponding number less than one, and greater than zero. So, between 0 & 1 there is an infinity of numbers, that can be mapped to all whole nubmers that "exist".

And between every real number, there is an infinite amount of irrational numbers, and so on...

Atom of Existence

However, rather than launch into a rigorous rationalisation of this idea, I would like to present it rather as a story of an unfolding. A story starting with the awareness of being aware—something which I like to refer to as "The Atom of Existence". All I know, without a doubt, is that I am aware of being alive. With this awareness comes the awareness of the state of not-being alive. Somehow, we have been granted the ability to perceive the future—that which is not but will be. In the presence of the certainty of life, we are simultaneously aware of the certainty of our future demise. Of nothing else are we certain—especially as regards the future.

This is why I like to refer to this living conscious dynamic, as the atom of (conscious) existence.

$I$ exist.... $I$ am... me? Let's identify this $I$ as 1... a single entity. However, do not become confused, I am not the One that is everything. I am but a single number in the infinity of possible numbers&that make up the Infinite One. note that each number is unique! For no two numbers are equal.

The Journey of the I

The beginning

In the beginning, I am not aware of the end nor that there is even an end.

I come into being not knowing where I came from. Some might say that we came from "nothing". This nothing(ness) is the same no matter the cosmology. Many today seem to be satisfied with a cosmology that believes in life as an autonomous event—unconnected from anything else that occurred or had occurred. Others believe that we are G-d, blessed be His name, the First Principle, wanting to have a "human" experience. The experience that we all share is that after I depart this world, a spark of life leaves my physical body, and for those who remain, I, as represented by my physical being, am no longer alive, no longer exist..

Was the "spark" of life something that "arose"—from nothing and nowhere—because of a certain combination of material that just happened to come together spontaneously—that is, according to a certain "randomness" that exists in "nature"? A randomness that might challenge all known natural "laws"? Or was it as a consequence of some marvellous event—like a particle or perhaps a wave of a certain energy—that emerged under specific, not fully known, conditions?

We just do not know. Perhaps this "eternal life" that is spoken of, or dreamt of, is the one whereby we will know—and be able to transition. That is, relate to whatever it is we will learn in death, that we could not while alive. Perhaps it is only through the experience of death that we can become aware of the greater continuum of existence.

In the end

A miraculous evolution in consciousness is the realisation that I am going to die in the end which immediately puts my story, the I-story, into a greater context. That is, although I live my life, something else—the same something that somehow enabled me to now awaken in this "place"—will at some unknown point, remove this particular awareness that I am now expressing (by writing this – for instance).

This I-ness is not yet an aware $I$. It is just conscious of its I-ness. For this $i$, its $I$-ness is a fact (of life, one could say). It takes many years (six or so, I believe), for the $i$ to become aware of its $I$-ness. It actually only becomes real, upon truly knowing another $I$—which will generally happen through love, if lucky enough to experience it.

Position

Every story begins with the one I am, and continues with the one I am becoming. The most effect way to do that is to explore all the I's that 'I am not'... yet. For that is the only progression to contemplate — that which brings the I to fully experience its own $I$-ness. As is said, "The only person to be superior to is your own previous self."

One thing we know is that there was a time when there was no-one. Though, if there was some thing, then it was the only thing that was. It was 'no-thing', or, at very least, 'no-one'.

Yet somehow the No-One had a need to express it's many-fold self and thus we say a point emerged. But it was not an ordinary point, it was all points as well. Just as when I say the number 21, it speaks of all numbers. Once you have "discovered" one number, you realise that all the other numbers exist too, even though some might never manifest.

But because everything begins with One, One decided to give itself a name, and called itself Point. Thus this One can be represented by a point. For a point is single dimensional, and only has a single characteristic — that of position.

Positive and Negative

As the Point took shape, in order to maintain the perfect balance, the non-Point emerged. Thus we find that, at its most basic level, every point has three aspects: the point itself; it's "shadow", or non-point; and the relationship between them. The last aspect is shown due to the fact that the "shape", the topology, of the non-point will be defined by the shape of the point it has given birth to.

As a shadow will be different according to the shape of the object (and the angle of the light), so will the non-point differ. Mathematically, we have expressed this as negative numbers. Something that took many years of exploration until it was accepted fully.

NOTE: To live in the negative (debt) is to live in the shadow. To live in guilt is another way of living in the negative. To live in gratitude is to live in the positive

Inner and Outer

Another way of looking at it, is that every shape has an inner (positive) version and an outer (negative) one.

For instance the triangle has both an inner triangle, and an outer one. Why is this a positive and a negative? Well, if we think from the perspective of the triangle, then everything inside the triangle is part of the triangle, and everything outside of triangle is not of triangle, yet is influenced by it.

This other I, we give the concept of 0, or zero - nothingness. Before I existed, what was there? When I don't exist anymore, what is there? So, we signify the other as 0, and the I, the atom of existence, as 1.

[Thus we have two points, 0 & 1, and the "line" or space/time between them. The gap that makes up our "consciousness"—for to realise that something has occurred after it has transpired—never before.]

Unpack

Start with number 1 (me, I). Think of it as a moment in "time" in which I (1) appear(s).

If 1 is aware, then there must have been a time when 1 was unaware, and as such, 1 did not exist, and that point we represent as 0. In fact, we can represent this death/extinction as 1 - 1 = 0. Meaning that the 1 and its corresponding shadow are in balance.

The dash representing the life you lived, and then was extinguished again. This is a statement we are all familiar with. But if we break it down philosophically, it reads something like: If we remove (subtract) the 1 which has appeared, with another 1, then we will, in essence, have annihilated the 1st 1, and produced nothing, or emptiness, which is 0 –nothingness.

Let us work it through this way. The space we are working in, is that space in which each one is unique, on the one hand, and that there is no difference between any other one—which could be any number—but, as there is only one such number, we can represent it as a I (one). These two extremes define our space/line. To be practical, we start with the simple, knowing that it might not be correct, and work out everything with that foundation. That is fine when one deals things that can be empirically compared. For instance, 1m = 1m... no doubt about it. In this case, one only speaks of quantity. But, when we enter into more undefined areas, this is very limiting. Does 1 dog = 1 dog... Well, only if it is the same dog. In other words, every one is different. Now, if we base all our data models on this principle, we would have to reduce it to the case where we identify the dog by its number, dog 23 = dog 23, else we will not be able to use our mathematical modelling to come to conclusions, and thus "solutions" (to what? for what purpose .i.e, what problem are we solving?).

This even becomes more out of sync when it is referring to human beings. Then numbers become death dealers, reducing humanity to a commodity, which has value in the current system, to be traded and used, just like any other item.

Another I (one)

With only one there is no creation, no dynamic, no interaction. So, either all the I's were created (in potential) simultaneously (as in numbers), or the original I had to be able to reproduce, and thus produce another I. Thus we have at least 2 such I's.

Thus we have two points, 0 & 1, and the "line" or space/time between them. That gap that makes up our "consciousness". And, as mentioned, when anything appears, its opposite emerges through "lack of", or its shadow.

The only way I could emerge, is by ~I (not-I) emerging at the same time. This is a place of not-G-d. A place where G-d has removed Herself. Thus, there "is" despair and pain and sin... all of this can only exist in a place where there is no G-d. The only way to create a space of not-G-d, when G-d is everything is by forgetting!

From the zero (0)

What emerges from $\varnothing$ - Nothing?

We started our journey at One, 'I am' and push in the direction of the many.

Through its reflection, we encounter its "other" face, which we term "negative" or dark — probably because we cannot really see it. This also spoke of an "emptying", with its subsequent reversal of direction. States of deficiency appeared and thus we had "minuses". The concept of 'less than nothing' had entered our vocabulary.

In order to travel from the "accepted" to the "less than", one has to pass through the darkness of the Zero, $\varnothing$. An unknown place of emptiness upon which everything stands. This zero point is also the anchor of the whole compass. It is the magnetic north on the spiritual compass.

In a nutshell: Through using the zero point — which also represents the ground state, where the energy is in balance — to anchor our description of physical events, we encounter the imaginary (events?).

But the tale does not end here, but continues... to an even more amazing discovery, that of the realm of the Imaginary.

Choice

The conditions to enable or create the condition(s) of choice means that we have contain an element at least equivalent to the Creator. In order to be able to have the ability to choose, in a world of "perfection" — the realm of the Creator &mdash requires a being that has at least one of the abilities of the Creator — and that is the ability to affect your destiny by exercising choice.

That is where the archangel Satan, or Lucifer: the fallen angel of Light, appears. Kabbalah calls it the spark of Divine Light that is in each of us. Lucifer, as the temptor, will attempt to influence our choice. But to have choice in an omnipotent universe is one of our core existentialist issues.

We are not an other. Nor are we beset by one, as a punishment. But are constrained by the natural order of things, by the natural order of existence, produced by the self-regulating nature of the universe. It is a behaviour that arises at certain levels of complexity.

Union with G-d

Union with G-d does not mean dissolution in the infinite Light of the Creation, but rather to receive this Grace, accept our blessing and our burden, of having the Divine Power of Choice, and stand with God. Not in the battle of against evil, for that is not in the Realm of the Divine, but of harmonising complimentary energies that oppose one another, and resonating with opposing forces that compliment one another.